Their Songs to Each Other
by WonderfulAndTragic
Summary: This is going to be a series of one shots based on songs, so please enjoy! I will take any song suggestions so feel free to review and let me know what you think! (:


**This was originally just gonna be a single one shot, but I am thinking of turning this into a series of one shots based on songs.. So, tell me what you think about me doing that! Also, this is my first M, so my apologies on how good/bad it is.. haha. Anyway, I hope you enjoy and don't forget to review and let me know what you think about me turning this into a series! (:**

* * *

**I shouldn't love you**

**But I want to**

**I just can't turn away**

**I shouldn't see you**

**But I can't move**

**I can't look away **

*Ian's POV*

Sitting in my dressing room alone was one of the hardest things. The memories of the past two years were permanently engraved in my brain and there was nothing I could do to get rid of them. I wanted Lucy in here with me but that was something that was never going to happen again; even she confirmed that. How she could mean so much to me and I mean nothing to her, I don't get it. The way she looked at me though; that had to be something. You don't look at someone the way she looked at me and then say that person meant nothing.

I was currently sitting in my dressing room scrolling through my old photos on my phone of Lucy and I. We looked so damn happy and truth be told, I was the happiest I had ever been when I was with her and now I am in nothing but a state of depression without her. I heard her laugh outside my dressing room as she made her way into hers with my best friend, Ryan. How she could go from me to him, I don't know. I could never see them together. I tried to ignore the laughter as I put in my earphones and started watching the videos that I had filmed of her while she was in my apartment. After our many long nights, I would film her while she slept, and I would film her while she made breakfast for the two of us without her knowing I was filming. She looked so happy in all of these videos, like nothing in the world could bring her down. I didn't realize I was crying until I felt tears roll down my cheeks and I heard a knock on my door. I quickly cleared all remnants of tears off my face and told the person on the other side to come in.

"You are needed on set in five," spoke Marlene.

"Okay, I'll be there in a sec," I responded as I stood up and put my phone back in my pocket.

I walked out of my dressing room and once again, I could not miss the unmistakable sound of Lucy's laughter on the other side of her door. She seemed happy, and I was happy for her, but I didn't want to be; like I also didn't want to be in love with her, but things just happen.

**I shouldn't love you**

**But I want to **

**I just can't turn away**

**I shouldn't see you**

**But I can't move**

**I can't look away**

**And I don't know**

**How to be fine when I'm not**

**Cause I don't know **

**How to make a feeling stop**

"Ian! How are you bud? Haven't see you today!" Ryan shouted as he walked back onto set to film.

"Yeah, well I've been around, not that you care though," I spoke with bitterness in my tone.

"Oh come on, Ian! Give it up!" he yelled back at me.

"I don't think, I don't think I can!" I yell back, defeated. "I love her, Ryan. More than you will ever know and more than you ever can. I just hope she realizes that before it's too late and her heart gets broken, because I know that it will happen," I say with anger.

"Whatever you say Ian, whatever you say," Ryan said with a laugh.

He was such a jerk and Lucy didn't even realize it but how I wished she would. She deserved better, and that better was me. I wouldn't ever hurt her; this was a promise I had made to myself a long time ago at the start of our relationship.

I looked down to see what scene we were filming and realized it was one with Lucy. It was an Ezria scene in my apartment and we were supposed to be snuggled on the couch in Ezra's apartment. I relished these moments when we would have scenes together. They were basically the only time I got to spend time with her by myself without Ryan being around. Every other time I got to spend time with Lucy we were always with Ryan and I felt like a third wheel, but he always seems to never let me stay home and always wants me to tag alone. I think he does it just because he knows I can't stand the thought of them two being together, especially not sexually. I never want that and just thinking about it makes my heart ache.

I look up from my lines when I hear the sound of heels clicking along the hardwood floor. I gaze up the body only to be met with those gorgeous hazel eyes of Lucy, the one I want to love forever.

**Just so you know**

**This feeling's taken control of me**

**And I can't help it**

**I won't sit around**

**I can't let him win now**

**Thought you should know**

**I've tried my best to let go of you**

**But I don't want to**

**I just gotta say it all before I go**

**Just so you know **

Lucy and I were currently sitting on Ezra Fitz's couch, trying to perfect this scene.

"Ian Michael Harding! Can you please get this scene right?! I'm tired of filming it!" Lucy yelled at me with a stern look on her face.

"Yes ma'am. God, what's wrong with you all of a sudden? You usually don't mind filming scenes over and over, oh wait, that's when they are with Ryan!" I yell back at her.

She looks at me with astonishment and then hurt washes over her face, and I suddenly feel bad when she gets up and storms out of the room. I could see that tears were forming in her eyes, but I couldn't help what I had said. I was angry and everything I said was the truth. I sat there for a moment pondering over whether or not to go after her, but that's when I realized it wouldn't matter because she has Ryan –the man who thinks he deserves Lucy- to go and comfort her.

I sighed and leaned back on the sofa, rubbing my temple. Why did I always have to go and ruin things with her? She was always so patient when it came to filming scenes and I blew up on her and I felt horrible. She has been on set since 6am this morning and its nearing midnight. I know she is tired and I feel awful, but I'm scared she's not going to let me go and apologize without screaming in my face to get out or a fight breaks out between me and Ryan; which is seriously not needed right now.

"Well, I guess we will go with the best scene we got shot," said the camera man.

I stood up and nodded my head. "I can maybe try and get her to come back out and film it again?" I said.

"It's fine Ian. Just go check on her," the camera man said. Marlene agreed so I just walked out of the apartment and went to the dressing room area.

**It's getting hard to **

**Be around you**

**There's so much I can't say**

**Do you want me **

**To have the feelings **

**And look the other way?**

**And I don't know**

**How to be fine when I'm not**

**Cause I don't know **

**How to make a feeling stop**

I walked up to Lucy's door and heard her crying and then I heard Ryan speak.

"Lucy, it's okay. Stop over reacting!" I heard Ryan tell her.

"You know, I thought you would be a little more caring, but I guess not. That's what boyfriends are supposed to do; care for their girlfriend and love them and be supportive, but apparently you aren't," I heard her reply.

And then I heard a loud sob escape from her and I broke right then. I turned away and headed in the direction of my dressing room and made my way inside and sat down on the sofa and pulled out my phone. Once again, I went through the photos on my phone and looked at how happy we both were just being together. I clicked play on one of my favorite videos of us and watched it.

-Flashback-

_I watched Lucy from around the corner of my living room. She was currently in the kitchen cooking breakfast while dancing and singing. She was only wearing one of my tshirts, specifically the one__ I had on last night. I snuck up behind her and held the camera up so she would be directly facing it when she turned around. _

_"Boo!" I whispered in her ear. _

_"Ian!" she shrieked. The pan she was holding fell to the counter and she started laughing. She was gorgeous. _

_"I love you, sweet girl. I hope you remember that, forever and always," I spoke softly. _

_"I know you do, especially after last night. That was one of the best nights of my life. The sex was terrific also if I may say," she answered with a smirk. _

_I playfully smacked her ass and she squealed before attacking my lips with hers. We kissed with a fiery passion and she wrapped her arms around my neck. I lifted her up onto the counter and kissed her harder, wanting to take her back into the bedroom, and that I did. _

-End Flashback-

I sat there thinking about everything that happened after that and a smile graced my face.

-Flashback-

_"Ian," Lucy panted as I threw her onto the bed. She slid up to the top and I crawled up over her. I yanked my shirt off of her and showered her face in kisses before making my way down her throat and to her breasts. I took a nipple into my mouth and started rubbing the other with my thumb. _

_"Oh, Ian," Lucy moaned. I pulled away and kissed back up until I was kissing her lips. I thrust my tongue into her mouth and we battled for dominance, me ultimately winning. She scraped her nails down my chest until she reached the top of my boxers. She slowly slipped her hand into them and wrapped her small hand around my hardened member. She slowly stroked it up and down and then rubbed her thumb over the tip of it. _

_"Lucy, please stop. I want to pleasure you first," I said with a heavy breath. _

_She pouted and then removed her hand and I slid my hand down her body, caressing every part of her. I slowly slid down her panties and threw them aside onto the floor. I ran my fingers along her slick folds before thrusting a finger into her hot core. I rubbed her clit with my thumb and added another finger. I began thrusting my fingers harder until her juices started flowing around my fingers. I moved my head down to her center and began to lick up her juices, caressing her mound with my tongue. I built her up again and then pulled away and kissed back up to her neck and began sucking on her sweet spot. _

_"Ian, please, I can't wait any longer," she pleaded. _

_"Whatever you want, baby," I said with a grin. I removed my boxers and thrusted into Lucy, hearing her cry of pleasure as I entered her. Before long I felt her clenching around my member and I knew she was ready, as was I. _

_"Come for me Lucy," I whispered in her ear. Not seconds later did she release and I let go myself. _

_We lay there wrapped up in each other's arms for another hour before we got up and showered and Lucy went back to making breakfast. _

-End Flashback-

I continued smiling and realized that that was one of the best moments of my life. I loved Lucy so much and I wanted to be with her.

**Just so you know**

**This feeling's taken control of me**

**And I can't help it**

**I won't sit around**

**I can't let him win now**

**Thought you should know**

**I've tried my best to let go of you**

**But I don't want to**

**I just gotta say it all before I go**

**Just so you know**

I didn't realize how late it was until I looked down at my phone and noticed it was after midnight. I got up and walked out of the dressing room and made my way to the parking lot. I noticed Ryan's car was gone but that Lucy's was still there. I debated on whether or not to go back in and check on her, but I figured she didn't want to be bothered so I got into my car and left and went to the small apartment I call home.

When I got inside, I threw my keys down onto my kitchen counter and kicked my shoes off by my bedroom door. I unbuttoned my pants and took them off and changed into a pair of sweats and threw my shirt on the floor. I didn't have a need to have a clean apartment because no one ever came here. I walked back into the kitchen and grabbed a tumbler out of the cabinet and poured some scotch into it and downed half of it before refilling the glass and making my way into my living room.

Ten minutes had passed and I was still sitting on the couch drowning my sorrows in scotch. I was slowly drifting off and then I heard a knock on my door. I put the glass down on the coffee table and made my way to the door before opening it.

**This emptiness is killing me **

**And I'm wondering why I've waited so long**

**Looking back I realized it was always there**

**Just never spoken**

**I'm waiting here**

**Been waiting here**

The person on the other side of my door was definitely a person I was not expecting to see.

"Ian," was all she managed to say in a barely audible whisper.

Lucy had makeup smeared around her eyes and mascara was running down her face and her eyes were puffy from crying. I never thought I would see her in the state.

"Lucy, please come in." I opened the door wider for her and she made her way into my living room. "Do you want something to drink?" I asked her as I shut the door.

She shook her head no and I walked over to the couch she was sitting on and sat down beside her. I reached over and took her hands in mine and she looked up towards me.

"He yelled at me and then broke up with me, Ian," she took a breath, "but I'm glad he did, because I know where I need to be and who I need to be with," she finished.

I looked at her and urged her to continue.

"Ian, I need to be anywhere you are and I need to be with you. I didn't realize that until now. I don't know how I didn't realize it, but it's the truth. I deserve you, but you honestly don't deserve me. I've put you through so much shit and I don't know why you've stuck around this long anyway. If I was you, I would've left as soon as my best friend started dating the girl I was in love with. I love-" I cut her off by attacking her lips with my own and I felt her smile into the kiss.

I pulled away and caressed her face with my hands. "Lucy, I love you and I could never leave you. I knew it would only be a matter of time before something happened and I wanted to be here for you, no matter what hell it put me through. And yes, I do deserve you, don't you ever say that I deserve someone better because you are the best one for me, I swear to you that," I said before kissing her again.

"I love you, Ian. And I'm so sorry for what I did and put you through these past months. I really am," she apologized.

"It's okay Lucy. I love you too," I replied before kissing her again.

And we spent the rest of our night making up for all the lost time while we were apart. I would have to say that this night was by far the best night of my life.

**Just so you know**

**This feeling's taken control of me**

**And I can't help it**

**I won't sit around **

**I can't let him win now**

**Thought you should know**

**I've tried my best to let go of you **

**But I don't want to**

**I just gotta say it all before I go**

**Just so you know**

**Just so you know**

**Thought you should know**

**I've tried my best to let go of you**

**But I don't want to **

**Just gotta say it all before I go**

**Just so you know**

**Just so you know**


End file.
